Confidence, more than any other personality quality, may be the most strongly linked to success. It aids a person’s ability to take chances and pursue opportunities in business. Confident people are also thought to be more attractive than insecure people, and they have a bigger circle of high-quality relationships.

What is it about self-assurance that makes it so appealing? First and foremost, it’s critical to distinguish between what confidence is and what it isn’t. It’s not vanity or a sense of superiority over others. Rather, it’s a quiet confidence in one’s own abilities without the arrogance that comes with hubris. Here are some of the things you’ll hear from people who are actually confident.

1. “I would not worry about it”

You’ll probably get this kind of reassurance if you go to a confident friend with a list of “what-ifs” or reasons why anything could go wrong. It’s because self-assured people are less likely to be concerned. They comprehend that even if something goes wrong, they can control it. It’s the constant feeling that nonetheless of what happens—good or bad—they will cope.

2. “Go for it”

A sense of optimism goes hand in hand with a lack of anxiousness. People who are truly confident expect positive things to happen. At the same time, their path record of producing sound decisions indicates that they can temper their optimism with a dose of reality.

3. “Why not me?”

Instead of waiting for the next chance, self-assured people go out and find it. Perhaps it’s forging the appropriate connections, asking for a raise, or otherwise taking a risk. These individuals have a vision for the future and are charting their own course to get there.

4. “Can you help me?”

Everyone has flaws, but the confidence isn’t ashamed to admit theirs. Confident people are more concerned with self-improvement, obtaining valuable skills, and doing a good job than with what others would think if they seek help.