“Was Sushant Singh Rajput really suffering from bipolar disease?” asks Payal Rohatgi who went through her own prolonged phase of depression around 2011 and consulted the same psychiatrist as Sushant…only to realize that the treatment was not helping her.
“On the contrary, the medication provided by the doctor (name withheld) was messing up my head even more. I was in a phase where nothing made sense. I was in Mumbai alone with no family, just like Sushant. I can imagine the thoughts that were going through his head. This industry can really wreck your self-worth. I was not getting anywhere in life. Then there was that whole phase when I was friends with Dibakar Bannerjee. I later realized all men have their own hidden agenda while befriending a woman,” says Payal
It was Dibakar who introduced Payal to the doctor. “It was a doctor that Dibakar was seeing apparently to resolve marital issues. At least that’s what he told me. He recommended the doctor and I visited him. I was told I had bipolar disorder. But I wonder if it was really that. Isn’t it convenient to label all depression as bipolar disorder? I realized this doctor is just star-struck. He likes having celebrities as his patient to build his equity.”
When Payal heard about Sushant seeing the same doctor something triggered off in her head. “I realized how close I was to suicide when I went to this psychiatrist who I now feel to be merely a quack. How can we be sure that the medication being given to Sushant was correct for him? And has the doctor maintained the doctor-patient decorum by preserving the confidentiality clause? Obviously not! If he had, the world wouldn’t be talking about Sushant’s mental condition. I think there should be stricter laws regarding the sanctity of the doctor-patient relationship.”
Payal says she pulled out of her depression by quitting old habits. “I stopped taking the medication prescribed by this doctor. I quit drinking and smoking. I quit Mumbai. I went back home to my mother in Ahmedabad. If I hadn’t done these things, I’d have probably ended my life.”
She feels for Sushant and wonders who was with him at the end. “Was he with a friend? Was he alone? I didn’t know Sushant at all. But I’m shaken by his death because it reminded me of where I was so many years. Sushant and I are connected by our mental condition and the doctor who claims it was bipolar disorder. But was it even that? I think the doctor’s role in Sushant’s life should be thoroughly probed.”