Nausheen Ali Sardar who is making her digital debut with ALTBalaji series Class of 2020 talks about dating and marriage!!
“Since marriage is a life long commitment, I think it’s better to be married only when 100% sure, rather than cave in to social pressure. For the moment, I am trying the dating game, let’s see how it goes,” says Nausheen.
“Dating app is a godsend for single women like me to meet guys. Otherwise, how will I be aware of good men outside of our frat? I am very shy and an introvert persona; I only let my hair down with closest friends. For example, if an unknown guy offers to buy me drink at a party, I will ask him to take a hike. It’s a catch 22 situation.”
So how do you choose your dates?
“Well, I only connect with those who clearly write that they are in the long haul and not for casual hook-ups. Even I will not say marriage upfront, for I first need to know the man before taking the plunge.”
Three C’s are important for Nausheen – chemistry, consistency and communication.
“Chemistry is very important and rare for me. I am very honest…infact brutally honest; so after the first date if I find no chemistry, I say it upfront. It’s better, to be honest than give someone a wrong impression or make it linger.”
“I can count my relationship on fingertips while today’s young girls will run out of fingertips, to keep tabs, to each his own, no judgment he freor this is the new generation.”
When asked about her choice of men, she says, “I go for ambitious hardworking and independent men. Don’t care if he has a Merc, Jaguar or a Honda…I am not materialistic.”
“A self made tag is something I find super attractive in a man. Some women are attracted to the money, no comments as it is their call.”
What about looks?
“Call it shallow, but looks are very important for me and so is height. I am 5.8 (super difficult, trust me).”
She goes on.
“After the swipe match, it’s important that I see consistency in man’s behavior.”
Here she adds, “For me, my man also needs to give me space and yet be there. The right balance is the key.”
“Once a guy told me I will sell off my land and come to Mumbai to marry you on a second call. Such hasty calls freak me out.”
“Having said that, I am quite understanding as well. Once when I went for a date I found the guy really tired, so willingly agreed to meet him some other day which I did. On the other hand, I blocked one guy who did not have the courtesy to inform me that he can’t make it.”
Like all gals, I too likes men who do the old school thing of opening the door and pulling the chair for the lady, it does earn them extra brownies points,” she grins.
What turns you off?
“Overclingy men period, even if we meet twice or thrice a week, it is enough given that both of us are busy in respective spheres of work.”
In closing, she warns the following to young girls new on the dating scene.
“Don’t assume…always speak your mind and ask. For example, if you are looking for marriage…and the guy has never been married…simply ask!! Stop thinking that he is the one or soulmate etc. If a man is 35 plus and is single never been married, either he is like me (very selective) or there is something wrong with him (could be mentally a psychopath) or third…he doesn’t want to ever get married.
So don’t cook up stories in your head girls…just ask.”
“And if he has to say the words, “I wish to get married” please do not assume lines like, I am looking for the long haul …as marriage.(wink).”
“Remember don’t look for the perfect man. There is no such thing as perfect. True love is when you fall in love with the flaws too,” she ends.